The Boys of Spring are back, bring ’em on!
“This won’t last,” is what the weather whisperers have been saying all day. A little amuse-bouche of Spring has been served up and at the perfect time. It’s a long weekend here in Ontario and it’s called “Family Day.” It’s a pretty controversial holiday for a number of reasons: Can we afford it? If I park my car in Queen Street, will I get a ticket? Is the LCBO closed? etc. I do not know the answer to any of these questions but to the third one, I will advise: stock up just in case. For me, the problem is actually calling it “Family Day.” Some of us don’t have families, and some of us who do, will not be spending any time with them. Don’t get lost in semantics, let’s just call it “Mental Health Day.” The day that in the middle of February we are allowed to fuck the dog (so to speak), sleep in, eat bacon, make prank phone calls, cut our own hair, and wear our pyjamas the entire day.
This is the landscape we must contend with:
It’s called a “snirt,” a dirty pile of snow. Inside snirt mountain, is garbage from Starbucks, melting poopsicles, and the dead serial killer from “Lovely Bones.” Of course we need a mental health day. For a complete list of what’s closed on “Family Day”, click here, don’t worry it’s the government website.