Tag Archives: Sprockets Film FestiVAL

Guess What, Chicken Butt? I Got A New YouTube Sensation

I don’t really enjoy children that much.  Yes, I have two of them and I can say from experience that the old adage is true.  Children are basically like farts, you can stand your own but others cannot be tolerated.  And who am I kidding?  Even when my own kids when were little, I wanted to hide from them and light a match.  In my previous post, I described my daughter as ‘Satan’s spawn.”  My son was no cake walk either , he had some piss and vinegar running through his veins.  His tantrums were legendary, ask any crossing guard in the East End.  You could never get him from Point A to Point B, but when finally got him to Point B, he never wanted to leave.  He’s going to make a difficult husband for some poor woman, I just know it.  Anyway, now both are teenagers and you’d think they be even worse but they are totally cool.  They are actually people that I want to hang out with (but not necessarily together because they squabble like an old married couple). 

Yesterday, Oprah featured a show on young “talent.” and I am using that word loosely in particular with Willow Smith, who was her cohost.  She has a new song out and you can see her perform it here (but why would you want to?).  Her best trick is swinging her head around like she is giving herself shaken baby syndrome.  Do it.  And it seems like there’s a new child YouTube sensation every week that we avid television viewers must contend with.  They are like pimples on the face of media.  The Bieber aside (because he is awesome),  most of these “sensations” need to just do their homework and wash their hair (I’m looking at you, Simon Cowell’s latest cash cow).   And Lady Gaga needs to get out more is all I will say about her little mini-me. 

And speaking of kids on YouTube and parent pimps, here is my son, Freddy’s latest short film entry for The Sprockets Children’s Film Festival this Spring….he won first place last year in his age group (mama pride!  It was just like he won an Oscar).  He is the future Quentin Tarantino (they have the same birthday).  Enjoy:

Purple Haze

What fresh hell is this?  Well, there goes the neighbourhood!  They’re finally building the condos at the corner of Rainsford and Queen Street East starting from $500,00 to $2.5 million.  Yes of course it’s thrilling for a realtor and a resident(cha-ching) of the immediate neighbourhood known as the  Beaches Triangle.  But sometimes it is sad to see things go…this is the Purple Patch of Queen Street (I`m going to write a song about it)…the place where the man (crazy or eccentric?  I’m not the judge) in a manic frenzy painted the entire block purple one summer, including his neighbour’s houses, the street signs and newspaper stand.  He got in big old trouble by the city of course, so he painted everything white….and then purple again….oy!  That’s a lot of work for a joke….I wish he’s come and paint my porch, I could use some purple in my life.  This is his house now.  I like the yellow accents:

And what small child (and raccoon) doesn’t delight in the koi pond under the bridge?  I’m sad to see it go.  Its frontage is a landmark.  And as an aside (and shameless plug), the backyard was used as Happytime  Sushi in my son’s short film for this weekend’s Sprockets Film Festival: http://sprockets.ca/default.aspx You can click on to Freddy’s film here called “Box Boy” (don’t worry it’s short and funny): http://www.youtube.com/user/FJ033