Category Archives: Handy Hints

My Own Personal Ashram

Day 4 of Beaches Bikram Yoga Challenge:  30 hot yoga classes in 30 days, 90 minutes per class, that’s 45 hours of moving meditation, folks.  I am only one tenth of the way there and I have already lost my sense of humour.  If anyone needs to hightail it over to an ashram, it’s me.  It’s all about my inwardness serving my outwardness.  I have to learn not to react so much:  stop fidgeting, breathe through the nose while ignoring the snot bubbles, stay still, be calm.  The lesson is what not to do is as important as what to do.  So, I have been thinking about what colour I’m going to paint my living room.  Last week I was at the new location of Le Papillon on Eastern at Coxwell, check out their website here.  The interior is really spectacular, in particular the yellow they use as accent walls.  I swear it is that mimosa colour was Pantone’s colour of the year 2009.    I am going to try to match this with some Benjamin Moore shade (sparkling sun).   Now the old me would have painted the entire room that colour but I have learned restraint in my yoga practise.  It is about finding the perfect off-white for the room that will set off the strip of yellow that I will paint above the fireplace.  It turns out there is some use for all the boring greige and taupe that exist in the interior design world in stodgy old Toronto (I’m looking at you, Brian Gluckstein). The calm of the neutral palette makes the colour have more impact, just like the savasana in yoga makes the postures stronger.  Just go along with me, there’s 26 more days left.  For more jolts of colour, I found a store in Little India called Rang, click here and look at all the pretty things:

Rang, 1413 Gerrard Street East    

Diana at Flohaus also visited a store full of colourful Indian decor accessories called Liloo at 734 Queen Street East, click here to see inside.  “Pink is the navy blue of India,” said Diana Vreeland in 1962.  I say bring more India to Taupe Town.  I’m going to add some fuschia pillows to the greige couch and some turquoise drapes, or vica versa…it will be my Ashram Room with a Nintendo and Wii, I’ll post the before and after photos!

Happy Birthday, Queen Vic-Chore-ia

I have a proposal to all Torontonians out there:  Stop calling it the May Two-Four weekend, as though all you do is hang out, enjoy life, drink a case of brewski (hence the cutesy two-four for 24 for the 24 of May in which Queen Victoria was born)…no, call a spade a spade, in fact, pick up a spade and start digging in yer gardens and call it May Too-Many-Chores weekend.  What are you doing this weekend?  You ask this to any random person that lives in the GTA and Smuggy McSmugginton will reply:  “Going up to The Cottage, blah blah…chores, this and that, painting a porch, blah, cleaning up bear and raccoon fecal matter, more chores, toasting bread in a toaster with mouse fecal matter embedded, blah blah”….Fun!  I’m here in the city with my own chores, keeping up with the Chore Family who live next door:

The Chore Family are the best neighbours I’ve ever had (they have my back!) and their compulsive need to snip, rake, weed (the verb), and refine their garden has rubbed off on me a tiny bit.  Their lawn looks like an expensive haircut because every fifth sprig is a clover.  Tip: when a lawn is entirely blades of grass it looks like a military haircut. the clovers add texture and visual interest.  Although I have learned this, I have not bothered to apply it, my grass has alapacea from stress.  They plant flowers in containers, I throw seeds in a plot in front of the  the porch because for me the only good plant is a useful one, ie edible (mint, for mojitos and tzatziki), protective (those sharp weeds, deters burglars), or awe-inspiring (that wretched overgrown butterfly bush that brings all the Monarchs around in September).  But now I tinker around a little more, pulling wayward green grass chards between the interlocking bricks, it’s a relaxing activity.  And the other day, I bought a hanging basket:

Go big or go home, is my motto.  I got the mega-hanging plant at the garden place at Coxwell and Fairside and paid 50 bucks for the big purple spill of petunias in a peat pot.  This weekend I will cut those dumb ass floppy fickle tulips out of the garden, pour some fresh soil and dump my seeds: California poppies and nasturtium….trust me, you can eat these, although why would you want to (?! that goes for you, too, Mr. Artichoke) but I bet they would make perfect garnish in some martini this summer, I’ll keep you posted on that.  So this weekend, I might call it May Six Pack because really, I need to paint my porch….

The Summer of Honey

Farmer’s Market at the East York Civic Centre

Yay!  Starting today, every Tuesday, the Farmer’s Market comes comes to the East York Civic Centre (on Coxwell Ave at Cosburn).  The East York Civic Centre is one of those handy places to know about where you can get your driver’s license updated and a flu shot.  And now that it is mid-May, the market is there once a week as well.  It’s still kind of early, so if asparagus doesn’t rock your boat, all the vendors aren’t set up yet.  The marble rye/poppy seed loaf people are there (try the honey garlic sausages, yum!).  And speaking of honey, the honey people are there too.  I got a honey skin cream that is supposed to be good for any skin ailment from diaper rash to eczema.  It smells fantastic, I’m putting it on my baggy neck right now, maybe it will look normal again or at least some vampire will want to bite it.  They have loads of flavoured honey.  I got the ginger infused one which is soooo delish and I am having right now in my tea.  You know, Dr. Oz approves of honey, it’s his Number One Pantry Healer.  I’m going to make this sticky honey soy chicken wing recipe, click here to watch the lady make it on you tube.  What did we do before you tube?  So much easier than reading a recipe and getting the pages all stuck together.  The cute boys who run the south side of market are back and they had the super skinny asparagus which I am more partial to than the big fat ones, oddly enough.  Roasted asparagus is a reason to buy that super expensive sea salt that looks like shaved flakes.  I’m going to try drizzling some of that ginger honey on them, bet that will be a taste sensation.  Mmmm, honey….oh, and here’s a recipe for a honey martini that’s supposed to be an aphrodisiac: 1.5 oz of rum, 1 oz honey, lemon squeeze, splash soda water, and serve with a honey stick (the farmer’s market had them!). You know, I would add some mint and call it a honey mojito…in fact, I declare it to be the Summer of Honey!  I’ll be trying out all the flavours, see you next Tuesday!

What Happens in the Car Wash…

Okay, birthday week is officially over now that all the Champagne is gone.  I can’t NOT say the word  “Champagne”  like Bubbles from Little Britain, “Champagne for everyone!”  Although I never really drink the real stuff, just bubbly wine, it could be from anywhere, I don’t care.  It puts me in the best (and craziest) mood and I will not tell you what I did in the car wash at Queen and Kingston Road.  If I wasn’t such a charming LOCA (lady of a certain age), I could have been arrested and no, I wasn’t driving.  Anyway, there is nothing a like a super fun Champagne buzz to bring on the most profoundly existential angst-ridden hangover the next day.  Will I ever learn?  No, but what I have learned is to embrace my inner wretchedness.  First start with Vitamin Water, it’s brilliant for replenishing depleted nutrients, the ones that went down the drain in the car wash.  It is my daughter’s mission to try every flavour so the one I got yesterday tasted like a pina colada….not my favourite, I must say.  After getting plumped back by the fluids, keep moving, go to the gym.  The sweat will pour out even on the lamest elliptical ride.  Then lay on a mat or roll on a  stability ball.  Think about what you’re going to eat next and YES!  it can be grease!!!  In fact, it must be grease, Doctor K’s orders:

Great Burger Kitchen 1056 Gerrard St. East

I went here, Great Burger Kitchen, because I saw a Harvey’s commercial at the gym.  They use locally sourced, naturally raised, free range meat and!  AND! They serve poutine.  I ordered a Greek burger, ie. man repellent (feta, tzatsiki, and ripe raw red onion…kiss me!)  I also ordered the poutine and I’m wondering if you have to be born in Quebec to get this but I guess not because I have been noticing all these “gourmet” poutine places opening up all over Toronto.  I embrace this, although I am a purist and have yet to taste any as great as the poutine at Patateville on Laurier Blvd in Beloeil, Quebec.  I don’t even want to know if it’s not there anymore.  But the poutine at Great Burger Kitchen sure hit the spot and so did that burger.  The next burger I order, which maybe as soon as the day after The Sex and the City 2 premiere next week, will be the “voodoo” burger….salsa, spicy mayo, guacamole, balsamic onion…definitely will chase all the bad spirits away!

What Mother Wants

 

This is why we love mamas so much….would the man-bird go out and find worms for his chickies?  No, he is probably sitting on some telephone wire puffing out his chest, chirping about nothing to nobody and then he’ll fly away, squirting white poop on your windshield without even giving it a thought.  Well, here’s a thought (and a reminder) tomorrow is Mother’s Day….it’s not Mother-specific as in Yo Mama, it is all Mother’s Day, and it`s not just morning either….the whole day is included, so don’t think you can just toss her a card and some toast at 9 a.m and you’re done.  No, you must honour all mothers, all day long.  Sometimes my birthday falls before or on Mother’s Day, which somehow cancels out this holiday in the minds of my spawn.  One year, it was late afternoon, when one of them pried his eyes off the tv and said, flatly:  “Oh, yeah, Happy Mother’s Day.”  Really, it’s 4 pm, the day is done, it’s too late for happiness but not too early for a cocktail.  This year, B-day is after M-day so I’m expecting the whole bucket of chicken, so to speak.  Mothers love buckets of chicken, by the way, at least this one does….you know which kind, and I don’t want to hear anything about how this particular franchise manages to breed Frankenchickens with 4 breasts and no heads.  Keep your urban myths to yourself and let mama lick her fingers.

Mothers also love flowers, so go get ’em:

Beachwood Flower Shop at 1916 Queen St East, east of Woodbine Ave is the place to go.  They make the bouquets upon specification and they don’t skimp on the superfluous foliage that makes a bunch of flowers go from humdrum to spectacular:

Mothers also like to stay in bed on Sunday morning to watch the back-to-back episodes of “New Adventures of Old Christine” on The W Network.  Feel free to TAKE THE DOG OUT and pick up some croissants at Zane’s bakery (the ones with chocolate inside) and whilst you’re at it, order her a chocolate birthday cake for Tuesday.  Everything at Zane`s (Queen Street East, just east of Brookmount)  is delicious, you really can`t go wrong:

So don`t forget Mother`s Day tomorrow….be nice to all the mamas out there!

Dog in Blog

Spring Pup Conan

AWWWWWWWWWW….puppies are out!  I can’t resist a puppy and there’s so many fresh ones out in the Spring!  Aside from my ultimate puppy fantasy, I’m pretty happy having an older dog, Betty,  who is 6 in the summer.  She is a squirming mass of misguided energy and “acts” like a puppy probably because up until 2 months ago, I thought she was part chihuahua and I forgave her for her savage behaviour, like the way Helen Keller’s parents did before they met Anne Bancroft in The Miracle Worker.  According to the doggie DNA test she took, she is 30% Border Collie (smart) and 20% Pomeranian (not smart)….maybe the rest of the woodpile is Chihuahua but even so, it didn’t show up in the test results.  She always seemed to have an old soul so who cares if she has no manners?  Okay, people cross the street when they see her scuttling along on the boulevard, straining and frothing at the mouth, but fear not, we keep her inside mostly.  I just read the most interesting book, The Art Of Racing in the Rain, by Garth Stein, which is written in the dog’s point of view about how he watches his family go through peril and wants to be reincarnated as a race car driver (oh, how I cried).  I think that about Betty, she is a little, old, tired, karmically challenged being who just wants to get to heaven (she has white  fluffy tufts that look like wings on her back) and they won’t let her in because she keeps on peeing in the clouds.  She is the cause of acid rain!  I love her so.  Anyway, Spring…along with all the sticky spittles of tree spew on my car, my house is full of tumbleweeds of white fluffy Betty fur…ACHOO ACHOO ACHOO!  Have you met me?  I have the loudest sneeze for a lady.  I made a cognitive decision several years ago to let my sneeze flag fly and man-oh-man, it’s good stuff.  So, vacuum, sneeze, vacuum some more until the bag is full, what better time to take Betty to Soggie Dog at 1054 Queen St East. 

Don’t feel bad for her….it’s all good at Soggie Dog!  They have bath stations where you wash your own dog.  The owner, Dawn, was there today to supervise.  They have a choice of shampoos and conditioners,  towels, brushes, and even a blowdryer that gets mores tufts away (we skipped that, too scary!).  At the end, Betty shook herself off and we shopped in the store which has dog toys, treats, and dog accessories.  So much better and easier than using your own bathtub, and now Betty smells like Mango Tango!   Sweetness!

Apothecary Now!

Last week one of my oldest friends from childhood came to town to stay with me for a few days. She also brought her Aunt Flo. My Aunt Flo caught wind of this visit and came barrelling over bringing along her twin zits. My Aunt Flo loves a party and never misses a vacation. She also enjoys weddings, funerals, yoga classes, and long walks on the beach. She should have her own Facebook profile. This post isn’t going where you think it is, no clogged toilets, doggie waste dispenser invasions, or hormones gone wild. My friend has started using a contraption called The DivaCup. During your mense (in case you haven’t figured out the true identity of Aunt Flo), instead of using tampons, you insert a cup made if health care grade silicone up your vagina and it collects all the goop, for hours longer than your super plus regular protection. The coolest part is that you have the satisfaction of seeing how much you actually produce and it’s not the Humber River in March like you thought. You clean it out and you use it again. Follow the instructions, I’m not going to go into more details about this thing except to say: go get one now before menopause hits and you waste your pension on paying $8.99 a month on a box of ‘pons. The DivaCup retails for under $40, do the math. I found my DivaCup at Beach Apothecary, 1854 Queen Street East. What a great place. Michael Bushey ordered one for me and it came in a couple days, just in time (My Aunt Flo comes in like a lamb and out like a lion). Beach Apothecary specializes in Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT), pain management, and veterinary compounding. They have herbal products and homeopathic remedies. It’s a very friendly atmosphere, definitely a pharmacy worth checking out for the whole family!

Kristin’s Sharp New Brows

Most things can be fixed with duct tape. Some things can be saved with a Sharpie pen. Off I went this morning to Staples to get a stamp made for my business cards saying “visit my blog: mytorontoeh.com” AND for a black Sharpie pen to cross out a certain line to save myself from ordering another 2000…it is Earth week after all. I love a small chore and a visit to Gerrard Square. I never come out empty handed, am a sucker for a kiosk where they have some really good ones for iPhone covers and danglies for the rearview mirror. Today I wasn’t really there to browse because I meant business and so did the cholita who served me. Lovely girl and amazing service but! eyebrows that were part Joan Crawford and other part Grade 6 Geometry, all angles and arches and curves in perfect symmetry and coloured in with the precision of a true artiste. I relate to Joan Crawford who once called her one wild, curly, errant eyebrow hair “Oscar” and she refused to let her makeup artist pluck “him” out. Me, I’m not so attached to my Oscars as they make me look like a grouch. So off I went to The Brow House to get my brows “designed” for the first time in all my 80 years. Yes, I have been using tweezers but also kitchen shears to trim them. I am the pot calling the kettle black when I obsess over other people’s eyebrows. Eyes may be the windows to the soul but the brows are their gossip columns.

The Brow House 1256 Queen Street East, east of Leslie

The ladies at the Brow House take eyebrows seriously. They combine art and science when creating the perfect brow. The fuzzy small hairs are waxed and the long ones are plucked. Oscars are brushed and trimmed. The absentee ones that you lost from old age or overplucking are reborn with a special wand filled with cholita dust and feathered on with precison strokes that God should have done in the first place. Does it hurt? I don’t know, who cares? Do I look exquisite? Yes, I do:

Next trip: Botox Village

Kristin’s Keeping It Real

Common advice by a home stager when you are selling your house is to  remove all your personal photographs “so that the buyer can see themselves in your space”.  They want to look around and imagine themselves cooking in your kitchen, eating breakfast in your breakfast nook, having dinner parties in your dining room, playing Balderdash in your living room, and pooping in your powder room.  And when they are playing house in their minds, they do not want to see this:

I have seen poster sized framed  wedding photos above fireplaces, on mantlepieces, in hallways and staircases….for God’s sakes, the person reading the gas meter can see these things, COVER UP, PEOPLE!  Nobody wants to see or celebrate your love, not even your own spouse.  Chances are that if you have a photograph like that hung up in your living space, they are plotting their escape:  You know who you are, now take it down and put it in the attic and pretend your relationship is like The Picture of Dorian Gray….(no, I am not bitter)….I actually do like to come into people’s home and see photographs if they are displayed properly!!  Personal photographs should always be framed, of course, and they work best in clusters.  In my house, I like them in standing frames, not too large, amid the tchotkes….yes, tchotkes, am all for relevant clutter, I even have them in my car (more on that later)…personal photographs give your home personality and a sense of the people that live there which can be very charming.  Here’s how scatter mine around:

my two babies

dogs that I have had and one that I still have

…and nostalgic photos that tell a story just by looking at them:  here is me and my brother on vacay in Cape Cod some time during the LBJ administration….we’re at the beach, lookin’ at the waves, tappin’ on the cooler, drinkin’ our root beers…and there we are in front of The Tent….we still talk about that tent, the one that had a foyer, a living room, two bedrooms, and a walk-in closet….condos at Cityplace should take the blueprints from that architectural canvas wonder…oh, but they can’t because my mother sold it at a garage sale in 1972….ah well, this is why we frame these moments…

Another option is to take your photographs and have them made into real art.  One of my favourite local artists, Angelene Tulett does just that.   She will take your photos and make them into something worth hanging onto your walls. 

I’m going to be featuring more of Angelene’s work next month because she has a show coming up in May. If you are interested in seeing more of what she does, contact her at :  angelene_tulett@yahoo.ca

hideous wedding photos courtesy of Awkward Family Photos http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/

Kristin’s 6 Things To Do To Sell Your House

I remember being a first time homebuyer in 1992….those were the days, my friend.  Although it was a “seller’s market”, the most a homeowner would do to tart up their house was to boil some sprigs of mint over the stove to control the odour of the kitty litter right beside the fridge.  And in the beach, people still fought over these houses.  We paid $1000 over asking on a semi-detached on Waverley Rd that had wall-to-wall rust carpet and different floral wallpaper in every room.  Now of course, it’s a different story.  In the last 7 years, we see houses in the east end going Recommended :  Diana at Flohaus http://flohaus.com/ for design consulting, 86it Junk  http://www.86itjunk.com/book.php for junk removal, for tens of thousands over asking and even more.  But to generate such a bidding frenzy takes work.  Like a gold medal athlete, there is preperation involved and sometimes it is psychologically draining!  Which is why, I highly recommend a consultation with a homestager before you tackle your to-do list.  A good designer will point out things in your house that are your blind spots, they will obliterate the ugly and suggest the remedy.  It can be as little changing the lampshades and throw pillows or as much as actually removing your furniture and replacing it with rentals. 

1. De-Clutter It  The first step is the hardest step but I promise you, this one is the most rewarding.  Once you start the purge, you might not be able to stop so be careful when you get to #6 on our list.  Go through all your closets and drawers in every room and get rid of everything you don’t use and there are methods that can help you, ie. Peter Walsh from the show “Clean Sweep” has a book “It’s All Too Much” and will suggest you make piles of keep, trash, and sell.  You can donate, have a yard sale, or have someone take it away.  If you have too much furniture but you want to keep it for the next house, you need to rent out a storage unit or a pod, stuffing it in the basement corner won’t do.  Basements are considered as living spaces these days now that televisions have gotten so huge.

2. Clean It   Thoroughly!  Have the windows cleaned  inside and out.  Potential buyers will look inside your fridge and make subconscious judgements if it s sticky and smells like old cheese.  They will peek inside your closet so spray your shoes and put some scented reeds in the corner.  They will also prowl inside your sanctuary, the furnace room, where you sneak cigarettes and talk to the spiders.  Vacuum and dust, under and over and keep it that way during the selling process.

3. Fix it  and if you can’t, hire someone!  Loose tiles, doors that don’t close properly, grungy grout, and the list goes on.  Always remember what Mies van der Rohe said “God is in the details” and  let me add the Devil is picky!  Buyers notice everything so make sure everything is well oiled and functioning.

4. Paint It  I know what you’re thinking “Ugh, why should I paint it when they’re probably just going to paint over it?”  My answer is, sometimes buyers lack imagination.   Decor is somewhat important for buyers to imagine themselves living in your house.  A new paint job is like a facelift for your house.  Pick light and neutral and you can’t really go wrong.

5. Re-Arrange It  Hopefully you have edited some of your furniture and put it in storage.  Now it’s time to move things around.  When people are viewing your house, they are going to need space to move around, so think about paths and arteries around the rooms.  Move a clunky club chair up to the master bedroom.  For some reason people like to see different kinds of furniture other than a bed in the bedroom.  Maybe because they think it gives them options.  Also move your dining room table around, I bet right now it’s in the wrong spot, most people go long when they should go wide.  And now that all your tchotkes are gone (they better be!), put out some flowers!

6.  Gather It  Find all your existing warranties fior your appliances, your receipts from house repairs and have it in a folder so when potential buyers, ask, you have some answers.  If you are selling your home in the winter and you have photos of your garden in the summer, have those set up to view.  Some sellers provide a pre-home inspection that is available for potential buyers but traditionally a home inspection is at the buyer’s expense.  Another option is to provide a home inspection binder from when you bought the house and then list the things that were done that were suggested by the inspector at the time.

Now you can sell it!  If you want more information and are thinking of selling, you can contact me kgp@rogers.com

European Clean 416-729-2077  for a deep clean, Frontier Sales 416-691-3300, see website here, for buying your used furniture and they will take it away