18

Jun. ’10

Every Dog Has Her Day

I’m on Day 18 of the 30 Day Bikram Challenge!  I`m over the hump and feelin`good, I could go on forever but I won`t, don`t worry.  This yoga fog can`t last.  I`m neglecting my posts and my personal grooming.  I think all that heat is breaking capillaries on my face at an accelerated rate and I can`t be bothered to put the slap on to cover them up.  Also I am pretty much wearing the same thing everyday:  England World Cup tshirt and I don`t even care if they win or lose.  One thing I have been doing is redecorating my living room and if I do say so myself:  It is kick-ass.    Except for one thing.  I need to hang the curtain brackets which means I need a man with a drill to help me.  I have let my needs be known and yet no one has risen to the task.  What happened to the benevolent universe granting wishes to people who bought the DVD of  The Secret?   Does the universe even know I exist?  At least the universe knows my dog, Betty, exists.  Yesterday she got a bone and then some.

Betty meeting Rocco at the off leash dog park

The other day I was watching, captivated, a show on TLC called Extreme Poodles which is a whole other topic of conversation but made me look over at Betty and say, “Betty, when was the last time we updated your profile on Facebook?”  So we logged on and lo and behold there was a message from the Toronto Beaches Dog Association (no I am not making it up, it exists, click here and check their website and you can `like`them on Facebook too).  The Nutromax Dog Food Company are donating a couple of benches to the off leash dog park in Kew Gardens, the one at the beach by the Leuty Lifeguard Station.  They were also giving out free samples AND the chance to win free dog food for a year!  Talk about benevolence, match that *Universe*!  So off we went yesterday morning to beach to get some Nutro action and a little excercise.  One thing about Betty is that she is mostly a leash dog.  Her legs are about as long as my thumb so she is always at a fast trot even when I am at a slow stroll.  But an off leash park is a pretty fine thing.  Did you know that the city of Toronto plants spies in bushes and unmarked cars to ticket dog owners who let their dogs off leash in undesignated areas? 250 smackaroos for the offending canine.  Back  before Betty, when I had those two wanderlusting Shiba Inus, I would had to pay a few hundred million dollars in fines.  Penny and Cruise, they were fine dogs but with feral spirits.  And not so fun hunting them down in the middle of winter pushing a double stroller.  If the off leash park existed back then, they for sure would have found their way out.  They are probably bolting around Heaven now, chasing squirrels and rolling in dead fish, bless their little hearts. Here are the currently alive dogs on their turf:

Betty off to get her free samples

We had a fun morning.  Betty made a few new friends and got some dog food sample (venison!) and a faux-bone she can chew that cleans her teeth.  I’d like one of those, please.  And!  She won the grand prize:  free dog food for a year!  Thank you, Nutromax!

Posted by . Categories: Eat & Drink, Hanging Around, Neighbourhood Watch. Tags: , , , . Leave a comment

13

Jun. ’10

Men Who Will Save The Day (Sigh)

 

Some wood left behind by a man, and not the good kind

Men.  They come and they go, that’s for sure.  Some of them leave without a trace more or less (maybe a dab of DNA), others bolt and they leave drywall dust and debris behind.  And their dander, yuck…as Dr. Phil would say: “Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out!”  And in my case, in my backyard last week: 6 giant elevator doors (don’t even ask) and two piles of wood blocking the driveway were my souvenirs from a hoarder with the organizational skills of Martha Stewart.  Also, in my basement are piles of useless items, bungee corded, Rubbermaided,  and labeled, laid out from tall to small still remain living a life of limbo.  To trash or not to trash.  Ebay or Craigslist.  Help me, Jesus.  Who’s going to save me now?  Certainly not my beloved Dr. Oz, he doesn’t know I exist.  If I set it all on fire, the firemen will come (hot) but so will the police (not hot).  Ladies, you can have your conventional hero fantasies, but  the fuel for my mojo are the Weir brothers from 86it Junk.  As far as I’m concerned, men who will take your crap away far out-trump men who can teach tennis, shuck oysters, play doctors on tv, ride horses, swallow fire, etc.  See what the Weir brothers can do for you, click here.

Taking it all away

Sean and Kevin are super polite and prompt and they will take anything away at a reasonable price, 416-310-8686.  So my advice is not let that junk multiply in your backyard or basement.  As I have always said, a man with a truck is a mighty thing.  But two men with a truck and some gloves are worth serving lemonade to!

Posted by . Categories: Do This Not That, Handy Hints. Tags: , , . Leave a comment

09

Jun. ’10

I Scream: I Am Not Lactose Intolerant!

It’s Day 8 of the yoga challenge, see previous post and the one before it as I am too lazy to link.  My sense of humour is taking a vacay but my appetite is alive and well and taking charge of the situation.  You know, I thought that over the winter I had become “lactose intolerant” in my Cougar Years because I had a reaction to hot chocolate in Yorkville.  By reaction I mean I had to sprint to Holt Renfrew while my friend was trying on shoes at BCBG a block away because HR has those specially enclosed soundproofed lady stalls that those with IBS and bulimia know about.  The hot chocolate was delish and worth the disruption though and I embraced the idea of being “lactose intolerant” because it made me seem like part of an elite group like the Masons or the Avon Ladies.  But a couple of days ago, I had a hankering for some ice cream and you know me, where the appetite goes, the body will follow.   What ever happened to ice cream?  Is it just me and my cronies, or has ice cream lost some mass popularity over the years?  As a youngster I used to eat it all the time.  Sealtest Heavenly Hash was my poison.  When there was only vanilla, I would take Fry’s cocoa and mix it in.  Then along came Ben and Jerry and I never looked back.  I even visited the factory in Vermont when I was pregnant, just call me Mrs. Chunky Monkey.  I could eat the whole tub.  But over the years I began to think, I best not.  Ice cream and wine don’t really mix, so I gave one up, guess which?  Duh.  In the summer, as a cool refreshing treat, why not have a popsicle instead of ice cream?  Ask my beloved Dr.Oz that question and guess what?  Popsicles have the high fructose sugar that is the evil that made America fat!  Ice cream (maybe not a tub) is the better choice.  So off I went to The Marble Slab at Queen and Lee, a 15 minute walk from home so if anything should happen lactose explodo-wise, there  are 2 Starbucks in my path (crappy coffee, awesome IBS friendly washrooms, decent ginger cookie).  Marble Slab is a chain where they scoop the ice cream up with Popeye’s bicep strength and put it into pint size ice cream containers while you wait.  Normally this would have sent me over the edge, but all that yoga breathing and such has put some patience in me.  You dig, girl, sssscccoooop it up, plop it in and scoop some more. What’s the rush anyway?  I ordered an ice cream cone (deep chocolate) and a couple of milkshakes for the chillen.  There is an option for extra stuff like cake crumbs and crushed up Skor bars.  I find this confusing and surreal.  It’s like putting lime in beer:  grow up, take it as it is.  Anyway, it took a long time but it was interesting.  She put my dark chocolate lump on a marble slab (hence the name) and weighed it.  At almost 5 bucks a cone, I should hope so.  And off I went, eating an ice cream cone like a lady.  Lick. lick, lickity loo.  All the way down the street and home.  No spills of any kind.  I am ready for more.

Posted by . Categories: Do This Not That, Eat & Drink, go girl. Tags: , . 2 Comments

04

Jun. ’10

My Own Personal Ashram

Day 4 of Beaches Bikram Yoga Challenge:  30 hot yoga classes in 30 days, 90 minutes per class, that’s 45 hours of moving meditation, folks.  I am only one tenth of the way there and I have already lost my sense of humour.  If anyone needs to hightail it over to an ashram, it’s me.  It’s all about my inwardness serving my outwardness.  I have to learn not to react so much:  stop fidgeting, breathe through the nose while ignoring the snot bubbles, stay still, be calm.  The lesson is what not to do is as important as what to do.  So, I have been thinking about what colour I’m going to paint my living room.  Last week I was at the new location of Le Papillon on Eastern at Coxwell, check out their website here.  The interior is really spectacular, in particular the yellow they use as accent walls.  I swear it is that mimosa colour was Pantone’s colour of the year 2009.    I am going to try to match this with some Benjamin Moore shade (sparkling sun).   Now the old me would have painted the entire room that colour but I have learned restraint in my yoga practise.  It is about finding the perfect off-white for the room that will set off the strip of yellow that I will paint above the fireplace.  It turns out there is some use for all the boring greige and taupe that exist in the interior design world in stodgy old Toronto (I’m looking at you, Brian Gluckstein). The calm of the neutral palette makes the colour have more impact, just like the savasana in yoga makes the postures stronger.  Just go along with me, there’s 26 more days left.  For more jolts of colour, I found a store in Little India called Rang, click here and look at all the pretty things:

Rang, 1413 Gerrard Street East    

Diana at Flohaus also visited a store full of colourful Indian decor accessories called Liloo at 734 Queen Street East, click here to see inside.  “Pink is the navy blue of India,” said Diana Vreeland in 1962.  I say bring more India to Taupe Town.  I’m going to add some fuschia pillows to the greige couch and some turquoise drapes, or vica versa…it will be my Ashram Room with a Nintendo and Wii, I’ll post the before and after photos!

Posted by . Categories: Get out of your comfort zone, Handy Hints. Tags: , , , , . 1 Comment

02

Jun. ’10

Think Inside the Box

Day One of the Beaches Bikram 30 Day Yoga Challenge begins today.  This is me:  I ALWAYS say I’m NEVER going do another 30 day challenge and yet ALMOST ALWAYS end up doing it.  Never say never, just sumbit, that’s me from now on.  There is something about putting your name up on a board and then placing a sticker beside every day after each class to mark your completion that makes you feel like as successful as a preschooler who did a boom boom in the potty.  So what is it?  It’s doing 30 yoga classes in 30 days (this month of June), click here for details.  Bikram is the hot yoga in case you didn’t know.  Hot yoga in a heat wave falls into the category of fitness paradoxes (like the cardio fatty who sashays blithely on an elliptical machine and gains weight, Oprah and me).  Why would you do hot yoga in the summer?  Because when you get all wretched and sweaty in a hot yoga class, everything else, including being stuck in a traffic jam without air conditioning, seems like a cool breeze on the Riviera.  When doing a 30 day challenge, there is some preparation needed, emotional and otherwise.  A fresh new Sigg bottle, maybe a new outfit, and yoga matt.  A lot of laundry is involved also.  I have discovered Purex mixed with Borax washed in cold water right after class so the sweat stink doesn’t settle is best for keeping things fresh.  Also I do not use a dryer.  Two years ago, my dryer broke and I have been hanging everything ever since.  Not only am I righteous about it as a speaker of preserving the environment but I have noticed that clothes last longer.  And here is where I got my drying rack and Sigg bottle:

Binz at 1934 Queen Street East

Binz is one of those stores that anally retentive people spontaneously burst their butt plugs with glee when they walk into it.  Their motto is:  “Think inside the Box” which is pretty much my thoughts exactly. It is piled with gizmos and gadgets that organize your life and things you didn’t know you need but when you get it, you wonder how lived without it.  My favourite is the spork (above right):  the spoon that is also a fork!  Binz is expanding their store so more things to behold. I’m planning to organize my closets this summer so I will be shopping there for sure, if I get around to it of course.  That 30 day challenge makes me kind of mellow so we’ll see how that project goes, I’ll keep you posted!

Posted by . Categories: an inconvenient truth, go girl. Tags: , , . 1 Comment

31

May. ’10

Hello Dosa

 

Udupi Palace, Gerrard Street East, West of Coxwell

If there is one thing I know for sure:  All things can be folded into a pancake.  And what is inside should be kept a mystery just like a woman, and you will get my drift from the photos below.  Last week, the roti from Cool Runnings was my lady lunch, a folded over doughy thing with chicken and other stuffin’s, and what is in the gravy?  I have no idea, I don’t want to make it at home.  If you tell me what the sauce is, I may not want to eat it. And when I am making my own everyday sandwich out of whole wheat bread, Ziggy deli slices, and Hellman’s mayonnaise, I am thinking about you, Chicken Roti (or you Polish Mushroom Blintz, or you Greek Lamb Gyro, and even you, American Aunt Jemima with your fake maple syrup and faint taste of bacon grease).  The Dosa is the Indian version of this culinary staple.  It’s a pancake suffed with spicey goo.  Yes, goo.  Indian foode is my most favourite of all and therefore I truly do not want to know.  My purposeful ignorance is all about reverence and I want to remain in awe and wonder.  A couple of friends and I go to Udupi Palace in Little India when our hankerings are synchronized.  We order the paper masala dosa, check this out:

As you can see from the photo above, to get inside the paper dosa, you have to dig deep…you have to eat a lot of crunchy pancake material and dip it into the coconut sauce before you get to the slap chunk.  It’s work, man, no joke.  The thing is almost the size of the body of my Miele vacuum and yet, despite its volume, I could definitely eat more than one.  In fact, there is a dosa eating contest every year for Sick Kids Hospital, click here for the details.  I am thinking of entering it, I am woman, here me roar and watch me chew!

Posted by . Categories: Eat & Drink, go girl. Tags: , , , . Leave a comment

27

May. ’10

Sex and the Shindig

Sex and the City 2

Last night Lorraine and I attended a special preview screening of Sex and the City 2 put on by the Women of Baycrest. All the reviews were in the papers that morning, The Globe and Mail gave it half a star and the Toronto Star trashed it also. Of course, the critics were all men. If I had to sit through a Star Wars sequel, I’d be pretty grumpy too. So I’m telling all you Sex and the City fans, don’t believe them! Go and see this cinematic eye candy with your best friends and bring a flask and enjoy! Lorraine and I had the best time. The Women of Baycrest know how to throw a shindig. Jeannie Beker hosted the screening and she looked amazing…subtle work? who knows, I am a fan! The audience was of course mostly women and the few men that were there were either gay or on a dare. To greet us, there were half a dozen hunky boys (hired, is there any other kind of hunk?) lined up by the escalators. The one that caught my bifocals asked me: “Are you ready to be Carried away?” Ahhh, the Cougar years, I am enjoying them immensely. Afterwards, the boys escorted us, all tottering in our stilletos, to The Roosevelt Room where we were greeted by Halston clad models holding trays of cupcakes. Again, what’s up with cupcakes? I feel stupid eating them. I wish I had brought my camera but purse was so tiny and stuffed with Tena pads that I had to use my iPhone to take pictures of the Halston Heritage dress gallery (available at the Bay):

We had delicious canapes and cocktails. Lorraine and I must have stuck out as the only goyim in the place because the lovely Jew-ells kept handing us their unused drink tickets. We danced (I’m a Single Lady, oh oh oh!) and had a great time and at the end, we all got a bag of swag! All for a good cause, click here and read about what the Women of Baycrest are doing for brain health. Best of luck, ladies, and thanks for a great evening!

Posted by . Categories: Field Trip, go girl. Tags: , , , , , , . 3 Comments

25

May. ’10

Give Me Shelter

This weather is CRAZY!  I’m not complaining, don’t get me wrong, but there is something about perfect, sunny, warm days that make me disfunctional.  I lose my indentity, as though I’m meant to live in the land of the dark and dour.  When it`s cloudy, I don`t have to squint and when it rains, I don`t have to wash my car.  When it`s crap outside, I can be inside!  The other day, the weather was so bright and hot that I totally forgot to eat.  Me.  I forgot to eat.  It was 2:30 in the afternoon and I was getting ready to prospect that really nice upper beach neighbourhood south of Gerrard at Main when I started to feel light headed and delirious.  What is this feeling?  Thankfully Bret Michaels explained on Larry King what a brain hemorrhage felt like, and this couldn’t have been it. I figured it was hunger, in an advanced stage, normally I don’t let it get that far.   All that outdoorness made me forget about foode (I spell it that way on purpose).  Luckily right on Main, there was a restaurant calling my name.  Cool Runnings is a cute little Caribbean restaurant at 146 Main.  I would like to claim that I discovered this little gem  (they have another location at 2708 Danforth Ave) but as it turns out, everybody I know gets hankerings for roti and they go here or have it delivered.  But now that I have made my discovery, I’ll be going back for more.  Here it is half eaten:

Chicken roti, too good to wait to have its picture taken

The beautacious Eileen at Cool Runnings

And wash it down with a Red Stripe!  I felt like I was on vacation, the people were so nice!  I could have stayed there all afternoon, just to hide from the sun.

Posted by . Categories: Eat & Drink. Tags: , , . 2 Comments

21

May. ’10

Happy Birthday, Queen Vic-Chore-ia

I have a proposal to all Torontonians out there:  Stop calling it the May Two-Four weekend, as though all you do is hang out, enjoy life, drink a case of brewski (hence the cutesy two-four for 24 for the 24 of May in which Queen Victoria was born)…no, call a spade a spade, in fact, pick up a spade and start digging in yer gardens and call it May Too-Many-Chores weekend.  What are you doing this weekend?  You ask this to any random person that lives in the GTA and Smuggy McSmugginton will reply:  “Going up to The Cottage, blah blah…chores, this and that, painting a porch, blah, cleaning up bear and raccoon fecal matter, more chores, toasting bread in a toaster with mouse fecal matter embedded, blah blah”….Fun!  I’m here in the city with my own chores, keeping up with the Chore Family who live next door:

The Chore Family are the best neighbours I’ve ever had (they have my back!) and their compulsive need to snip, rake, weed (the verb), and refine their garden has rubbed off on me a tiny bit.  Their lawn looks like an expensive haircut because every fifth sprig is a clover.  Tip: when a lawn is entirely blades of grass it looks like a military haircut. the clovers add texture and visual interest.  Although I have learned this, I have not bothered to apply it, my grass has alapacea from stress.  They plant flowers in containers, I throw seeds in a plot in front of the  the porch because for me the only good plant is a useful one, ie edible (mint, for mojitos and tzatziki), protective (those sharp weeds, deters burglars), or awe-inspiring (that wretched overgrown butterfly bush that brings all the Monarchs around in September).  But now I tinker around a little more, pulling wayward green grass chards between the interlocking bricks, it’s a relaxing activity.  And the other day, I bought a hanging basket:

Go big or go home, is my motto.  I got the mega-hanging plant at the garden place at Coxwell and Fairside and paid 50 bucks for the big purple spill of petunias in a peat pot.  This weekend I will cut those dumb ass floppy fickle tulips out of the garden, pour some fresh soil and dump my seeds: California poppies and nasturtium….trust me, you can eat these, although why would you want to (?! that goes for you, too, Mr. Artichoke) but I bet they would make perfect garnish in some martini this summer, I’ll keep you posted on that.  So this weekend, I might call it May Six Pack because really, I need to paint my porch….

Posted by . Categories: Handy Hints, Hanging Around, Neighbourhood Watch. Tags: , . Leave a comment

19

May. ’10

The Summer of Honey

Farmer’s Market at the East York Civic Centre

Yay!  Starting today, every Tuesday, the Farmer’s Market comes comes to the East York Civic Centre (on Coxwell Ave at Cosburn).  The East York Civic Centre is one of those handy places to know about where you can get your driver’s license updated and a flu shot.  And now that it is mid-May, the market is there once a week as well.  It’s still kind of early, so if asparagus doesn’t rock your boat, all the vendors aren’t set up yet.  The marble rye/poppy seed loaf people are there (try the honey garlic sausages, yum!).  And speaking of honey, the honey people are there too.  I got a honey skin cream that is supposed to be good for any skin ailment from diaper rash to eczema.  It smells fantastic, I’m putting it on my baggy neck right now, maybe it will look normal again or at least some vampire will want to bite it.  They have loads of flavoured honey.  I got the ginger infused one which is soooo delish and I am having right now in my tea.  You know, Dr. Oz approves of honey, it’s his Number One Pantry Healer.  I’m going to make this sticky honey soy chicken wing recipe, click here to watch the lady make it on you tube.  What did we do before you tube?  So much easier than reading a recipe and getting the pages all stuck together.  The cute boys who run the south side of market are back and they had the super skinny asparagus which I am more partial to than the big fat ones, oddly enough.  Roasted asparagus is a reason to buy that super expensive sea salt that looks like shaved flakes.  I’m going to try drizzling some of that ginger honey on them, bet that will be a taste sensation.  Mmmm, honey….oh, and here’s a recipe for a honey martini that’s supposed to be an aphrodisiac: 1.5 oz of rum, 1 oz honey, lemon squeeze, splash soda water, and serve with a honey stick (the farmer’s market had them!). You know, I would add some mint and call it a honey mojito…in fact, I declare it to be the Summer of Honey!  I’ll be trying out all the flavours, see you next Tuesday!

Posted by . Categories: Eat & Drink, Handy Hints, Neighbourhood Watch. Tags: , , , . 1 Comment